What I've Learned About Fatherhood:

If you've been around me for a long time you will know that my favorite parable of Christ is found in Luke 15. Jesus is describing to the Pharisee's why he eats with sinners. In that Parable he talks about the love of the Father on a Son who ran away from home and squandered all he had on 'wild living.' A few years ago I read Henri Nouwen's book called the 'The Return of the Prodigal' and in it he describe that we often times associate ourselves with either one of the two brothers. Either we are like the Pharisee's and wonder how God could forgive the worst of sinners. Or we are like the prodigal who ran away from God and has returned to find God a loving Father and a merciful Lord.

Nouwen points out that while those two ways of thinking are legitimate the point of Christ's parable was to get his listeners to live and act like the Father. This thinking has revolutionized my thinking. For too long I had wallowed in my own sin thinking myself quite a Prodigal Son. Then I've had my bouts of Pride and Arrogance much like the Older Son. All along though God was calling me to be like him. To be willing to embrace those who hurt me and are unkind to me. In no way have I completed the journey of becoming like the Father, but in many ways I'm further along the journey then ever before.

The favorite part of my day over the last three weeks has been lying down at night beside Bird. It seems like that is when our baby is most active. She has read that during the day as a woman walks around the baby in the womb feels like they are being rocked and often sleep during the day and are active at night. We have found that just as Bird lays down the sleeping babe wakes.

I've learned that the greatest joy in my day has been putting my hand on her belly and feeling our baby move. Sometimes its a slight bump and at other times its a flip (or at least it feels that way) but always its a miracle.

Bird was 23 weeks preggo yesterday. She is feeling good during the days but simply cannot sleep at night. This morning I was up at 6 and found her reading in the front room and not having one minute of sleep. Nevertheless she is smiling, she is happy, but she is exhausted. Will you pray for her?

A few times in the last two weeks I've been brought to tears thinking about fatherhood. Words don't really describe my feelings. As I've listened to a song or have been thinking about baby names...I've never felt it before...but I hoping that actually being a father may allow to be just a little bit more like the Father in Luke 15.